It's Gallery time again over at Tara's Sticky Fingers - and this week the theme is joy. I am sure there are going to be some cracking posts submitted - I can't wait to get reading. The Gallery is one of my favourite bits of the blogosphere - there is so much going on there!
So - joy. Of course it's got to be a photograph of newborn O in the hospital. But not the one I pictured in my pre-birth dreams, the one where I'd given birth, he was handed to me and we had the precious picture taken, as he laid against me and started breastfeeding. I didn't get that - he was whisked off to special care soon after being born, struggling to breathe after being born blue and with his cord wrapped twice around his neck.
I mourned this loss of the perfect bonding for a long time, but it's OK now - I can talk about it without crying, because however traumatic his getting here, my little man is fine and dandy, bloody gorgeous and I celebrate his life every day. The older he gets, the more and more I love him.
My mum and dad came to see O when he was in special care and weren't allowed to hold him, as he wasn't well enough. I remember the look of longing and love in my mum's eyes as she gazed at him in his little plastic cot and it will stay with me forever.
The picture I've chosen is of O and Mum. He's two days old, out of special care and a healthy baby. The look on her face says it all - she is finally holding her precious grandson, he is fine and she is the happiest and most joyful Granny on earth.
When I look at this picture I see in her eyes the love that my mum has for me and the very start of the special and enduring relationship between her and O. He adores his granny and when I was ill, she was the one who stood in for me during the really difficult times when I couldn't be there and ensured that he was safe and loved through it all.
Thank you, Mum - for everything. Here's to more joyful moments. xx